Moving On After A Breakup Is Hard
Sometimes we are unable to let our ex-partner go, whatever the reasons for the breakup.
The pain and suffering is very dependent on how long you have been together. A breakup is easy to get over after a relationship of only a few months. If the relationship has lasted for several years, it is much more difficult.
In any case, it’s important to know how to turn the page, even if you’ve found that you’re not so good at letting go and moving on with other types of problems.
Let go and give yourself the chance to move on!
Why do we have such a hard time separating from our ex-partner? Do we love him or her that much?
A relationship ends and both partners are aware of the reasons for the breakup. But sometimes it’s hard to move on because you believed you were in love with the other person.
In some cases, partners try to give the relationship another chance, but the past problems keep recurring and are not resolved. Then follows another break, which is even worse and more painful than the first.
We will explain here the reasons why you are not able to let go of your ex-partner after a breakup.
1. Emotional Dependence
Many people suffer from emotional dependence. That is the inability to live without being in a relationship. Sometimes this is a result of the lack of affection or emotional deficits they experienced in childhood.
Emotional dependence is the reason why we are unable to separate from a partner. Even if we are not in a relationship, even if there is no other person, we fill the void with something else. Because when we are a dependent, we try to never be alone.
When you have this problem, you don’t realize that you don’t really love your partner. There is no love, but need. You need your partner.
2. You don’t like to lose
Let’s not beat around the bush. Nobody likes to lose, or at least this is true for most people. The end of a relationship was not part of your plans. Moreover, the idea of romantic love reinforces this thought.
When a relationship ends, we believe that our life is over. Everything stops and we are convinced that there is no future. Think carefully about what you feel.
Are you really hurt or is it your thoughts that are causing the pain? Because sometimes our emotions and feelings get completely confused because we don’t see the situation in perspective.
What is the reason I can’t let go? Because I like him or her or because I feel hurt?
3. Leaving your comfort zone
Many confuse the inability to let their ex-partner go with the fear of being alone. However, this goes much further. We are afraid to leave that comfortable situation. We are used to that, because change has always frightened us.
Try to imagine this for a moment. You have been living with your partner for a long time. You really don’t want that situation and everything related to it to change.
So do you think you will feel safer if you reject that change. Because you fear that everything will get worse if you let go. Think calmly. What are you actually afraid of?
Sometimes our fears are totally unfounded. In many situations we are carried away and forced to leave our comfort zone. We don’t like this. But if we have no other choice, we do not refuse; because there is no other alternative.
Don’t be afraid of change. If your relationship goes wrong, the best solution is to take a different path.
At many times we don’t want to let go of an ex-partner. The reason is that we feel uncomfortable facing life without that person’s presence because our ex-partner has been by our side for so long. What we are describing here is actually selfishness.
Learn to let go in a breakup
We must learn to let go. It’s the only way to proceed. Our perception of romantic love is also a big misconception: the belief that there is no life without our partner.
A breakup doesn’t mean your life is over. It just means that a chapter has been closed. And since when does a book have only one chapter?
Turn the page. Continue writing the book of your life. You still have so much to deal with, so many experiences to experience!
